This is for all the people who feel tired, hurt, anxious, depressed, whatever you are feeling right now, always remember that your emotions are valid. It’s okay to pause but please never stop.
You may say or think, “You don’t really understand me, you are not in my shoes.” And that’s okay. As we aforementioned, no one has the right to invalidate you, but know, that we’re here to lend our helping hands, through our words.
Here, we have compiled 16 ways to calm yourself when you feel like everything is not going your way and when life makes you feel like giving up.
1. Walk: Walking helps clear your mind. It offers you a different perspective.
We all come to a point of break-down. We feel drained. We overthink about it until we lose hope. Let your mind rest. Take a walk outside. By then, you’ll see several people, feigning smile, but might be struggling just like you. And they choose to go on. Try to look at the sky. Stare at the birds hovering above. They are feeling their freedom, unaware that anytime, someone might actually prey on them. The trees! Imagine how strong they are to withstand a devastating typhoon. You see, it is all about training your mind to view things differently. Do not let life deranged you, stay sane!
2. Indulge: Take a day off to spend a whole day doing exactly what you want.
Give yourself a break. If you want to rest, sleep. If you are craving for a specific food, eat. If you want to go shopping, do it. You can read your favorite book and series all day long if they can make you feel better. Paint or draw anything even if they don’t make sense. Sing at the top of your lungs or dance to the music like there’s no tomorrow. It’s not a waste of time, you’re simply investing in yourself, after all, at the end of the day, you only have yourself.
3. Be Generous: Give something to a total stranger. Acts of giving makes us feel warm and fuzzy inside.
You probably seen a little kid genuinely smile because of a candy. Or some beggars who received small token from a stranger. That’s right. The smile people plaster in their lips after your small act of kindness is what makes you warm and fuzzy inside. The fact that you are having a hard time but manages to brighten up someone’s day, you are doing a good job!
4. Sit in a coffee shop or a busy street and soak up your surroundings. You don’t have to talk to people.
Environment plays a vital role in your healing process. Whether you want a serene or noisy environment, that’s all up to you. And sometimes, it’s better not to talk at all, about anything, to anyone.
5. Educate yourself: Research what it is you are experiencing. Arm yourself with knowledge and the resources to tackle the problems head-on.
Did you have a disagreement with your parents? Does your study making you feel pressured? Are you fired from your job? Is adulting giving you a quarter-life crisis? It’s time to gear up! Browse the internet to help you find solutions to your problem.
6. Preparation: Write the day’s to-do list the evening before.
By listing down what you will do for tomorrow, you are obliging yourself to accomplish those tasks. That’s one way to motivate yourself because you know you have the reasons to get up first thing in the morning.
7. Strengths: Write down a list of 20 of your strengths.
Fixate your eyes on what you can do. Acknowledging your strengths will prompt you to develop your self-confidence and self-esteem, and eventually you will learn to give value to yourself.
8. Keep going forward. Keep taking small steps, no matter what. Being stagnant doesn’t serve you.
You are the sailor of your own boat. No matter how many storms strike your expedition, keep sailing forward. You cannot stop midway or else you will let yourself drown. Just think to yourself that after those thunders and lightnings, you will see the sun smiling at you again.
9. Re-visit an old hobby: If you don’t have one, create one.
How many times have you looked at yourself in the mirror lately? Have you asked yourself, “Where did the old version of myself go?” or “Can I even do anything?”. Funny, because the answer is right within you. Start doing things the way you used to or if you have none, begin exploring to know what you are capable of.
10. Prioritize: Decide what’s important right now. Say no to extra obligations.
It’s as simple as segregating garbage. You will keep those recyclable and disregard those not beneficial anymore. If you are fired from work because of a mistake, try to take it as an opportunity for your growth to become a better person. If you didn’t get high grades at school, it’s alright. It’s hard especially when your family is counting on you, but slowly, they will understand. And later on, you will realize that there’s more to you than those numbers.
11. Sleep: Get enough rest. Sleep 7-9 hours each night.
Change your sleeping habit. A well-rested body enables you to be energized and productive. Which means you can properly function throughout the day. People are actually more vulnerable at night so sleeping on time also prevents you from overthinking things that don’t even exist in the first place.
12. Be silly: Do something that you did as a child. Don’t take life too seriously.
Life is a carnival. You have to play sometimes to have fun. Let yourself play or else life will play you. It’s time for your inner child to take place.
13. Cry: Release all that emotion. You will feel better.
Everything falls, even your tears. And that’s alright. If it feels too heavy in your chest, cry your heart out. Surely, you will feel reborn afterward.
14. Check your self-talk. Negative self-talk does not serve you.
Don’t be cruel on yourself. Having weaknesses is humane but speaking bad about yourself because of them is just harsh. You should work on those weaknesses instead so they will become your strengths.
15. Journal: Develop a habit of journaling. This will help free your mind.
If you feel like keeping everything to yourself, write it out. It will help you release the thoughts that are bugging you. You will definitely feel a lot better after writing them down.
16. Remind yourself that life is a journey. Remember that what you are going through is temporary. It will pass.
Easier said than done, right? But, hey! You have come this far. That’s already enough. Always take note that you cannot close a book when you are still in the middle part, because the ending is just the beginning of your life.
We all have our own problems in life. Some handles them swiftly, and others stumbles upon them. But you know what, apart from water, people are composed of problems, which means it is natural and inevitable and we must always march forward.
When life gets tough, you just have to take a deep breath and follow the ways we intended for you. It will not completely solve your problems, but maybe, it will help you fuel the driving force in you to see that’s there’s always more to what you are going through right now.